Devilishly Wicked

I've been dreading blogging.  Dreading it.  Which is bad because I just participated in a blog hop and I have 8 new friends.  YEAH.  I should write content for these new friends, but why would I want to blog when I could be really writing...ugh. 

So here is a reminder to myself: Blogging is real writing! 

I think I've been putting too much pressure on myself to write good content. So here is a fun random post that has no good content whats so ever.

I bought The Blank Book by Lemony Snicket from the thrift store a week ago.  A few pages were torn out, but it was blank and it looked pretty new.  I've been using it as a writing journal by taking simple notes to remind myself what I've done for the day.  Writing in the blank book makes my feel devilishly wicked.  Yes, I said devilishly wicked.  The book makes me feel like I can take over the world and do lots of damage simply by writing in it.  That is just so weird.  Moleskin journals be damned.  I prefer a journal that praises devilish thoughts and wicked deeds.  I want to go to Amazon and buy more used copies so that I'll have back ups.

 I bought a couple Kendrick Lamar CDs:  1 and 2.   and the music has caused me to contemplate on my own religion and/or spirituality.  I even have the half written blog post as proof.  Coincidentally, my daughter and I saw This is the End over the weekend and it had her contemplating religion and God.  That movie was crazy and very vulgar, but I think it was also one of the funniest movies I've ever seen.  But the movie still encouraged deep thoughts… Kudos to any  musician or movie that can evoke that type of thoughts nowadays.  When asked about it, my fifteen year old said it was crazy but had a good message:  Be nice to people.  That’s such a simple message, but its much easier said than done. 

PS.  Michael Cera acting like an asshole in the beginning of the movie just made him that much hotter...  

Motivation and Fear

THE FACE OF FEAR 

So.... because of the hint that Scrivener will be making an app for the Apple Ipad, I bought an expensive ass Ipad.  I feel soooo guilty.  It costs as much as my laptop and does not do as much. 

There are is so much guilt attributed to this thing that it makes my head hurt.  I could have used that money for house repairs, car repairs, college education fund, that thing that starts with a W (I'm still too scared to say the real word outloud).  What if i don't use it for anything important?  I'm not even sure if the Microsoft version of Scrivener will be compatible with the iPad version of Scrivener.  And what if i still don't get anything published. 

I will use the fear of excessive consumption as a motivator to do more work and feel less guilty about this expensive ass piece of equipment.  I am writing this blogpost on it right now. Here are my ultimate goals:

1. Completely finish working on the outline for BLACK BEAUTY

2. Submit the short story Chaos continuously

3. Have Coal ready by November.

Middle Grade vs. Young Adult

At the OWFI conference, I paid special attention to the Young Adult (YA) panels because I was feeling as they my YA novel was more Middle Grade (MG) instead of YA. 

According to Saundra Mitchell,  Young Adult is about finding your place in the world and the voice is immediate and in the moment and the protagonists are usually between 14 and 19 years old.  Middle Grade is about finding your place in a family unit and typically has protagonists between the age of 8-13.  See hand out here.

Okay…. By those terms my books is definitely Young Adult.  My protagonist is sixteen and the voice is immediate and in the moment.  But something still doesn't sit right with me.  So I asked myself, what makes great Young Adult novel for me?  IMO, the difference between Young Adult and Middle Grade is YA includes sexual tension and, if I'm lucky, maybe a little sex.  And if I'm really being honest, it also includes blood and a little bit of violence. 

At the beginning of COAL, there is lots of pent up sexual tension.  The middle and the end-- not so much.  And there is no blood or violence until the end of my novel. 

Oddly enough.  I feel like I should ramp up some of the sexual tension in book one, but I feel no need to ramp up the violence. 

Hmmph…

If you're a YA reader, what makes or breaks YA for you?

NYC Dreams

I've been gone for a few days to NYC and I need get back in the groove of things.  I should be editing, but instead of writing.  I love NYC.  I wish I could live there.  My daughter and I went last year and loved it so much we had to go again.  The second time was better than the first.  Instead of staying in the  middle of Manhattan, we stayed in Harlem.  In a BROWNSTONE.   It was beautiful and I fulfilled my dream of pretending to live in NYC.  I know four days is nothing like actually living there, but I have to take what I can get.  For me, NYC is the perfect city.  Its diverse.  Its full of parks, and it has a great public transportation system.  If only I could afford it.

Here are a few pictures:

My son standing at the Brooklyn Museum of Art

Central Park

Marcus Garvey Park

Oath Breaker: The May 20th Tornado

I used to believe

This was taken from the front entrance of my daughter's school

that parenting was easy.  Once I got settled, learned to manage my money and Maya got over her eczema parenting was a breeze.  Well for the past two years, parenting has been kicking my ass.  I feel like I've gone 12 rounds with Mike Tyson.  I’m so worn out that I MADE my children get me mother's day presents.   I've never done that before, but I Made them do it  because dammit I feel like a mother.  I feel like I've been working my ass off and I need to be recognized for it. 

I live on the cusp of Moore, Oklahoma and my  kids go to school in Moore.  I had the thought to pick up my kids at lunch, but I thought that they would be safe in school and I didn't want to use any of my vacation time.  But then as I sat in traffic for an hour to pick up, I've never been so close to the immediate destruction and aftermath of a tornado.  I've always been at home with my kids and or my family.  This was the first time that I've ever been separated from them during a tornado and so this is the first time a tornado has ever hit home for me.  And not because it was near my home or because it was dangerous.  It was the scariest because for the first time I wasn't with my kids .  It never touched my kids' schools, thankfully, but my heart goes out to the parents of Briarwood and Plaza Towers where the tornados did hit. 

This parenting thing aint no joke.   

  

Aside: I used to laugh when people would tell me that they wouldn't move to Moore because of the tornados.  To me that was like saying I wouldn't move to Oklahoma because of the tornados.  But after Monday, I'm rethinking the humor in those statements.  And I'm about ready to move.  Tornados and the city of Moore have always had a pact, no schools.  Homes and business are fair game, but no schools.  The tornado broke that pact Monday.  Oath Breaker!

Two Strand Twists and Deadlocks

I've decided to lock my hair.  Of course, I'm too cheap to go to a salon so I'm doing it myself.   My hair locs on its on when its braided.  How hard can it be?   Pretty hard.  I had this idea in my head that if I did some mini two strand twists and undid them then I would be able to start my dreads no problem.  

My Hair right after I took out the twists.  Cute.

Wrong.  Apparently it’s a long process and when you start with two strand twists you don't unbraid them. GASP.  That was a shocker because two strand twists do not look like dreads. 

Well...after a few MONTHS the twists thicken and become dreaded and you palm roll the roots every few weeks

Hair a few days later...not so cute

In order to m educate myself, I'm going to chronicle my journey on the two strand twist method of dread locking on this blog.  But hey, this is supposed to be a writer's blog.  Yes, it is.  I thought about creating a separate blog, but I ain't got time for that.  Besides, I only have a few followers.  

So here are some of the questions I need to answer:

1. Are my two strand twists too small?  Do I need to evenly part my hair for them to look good?
2. Should I start over with freshly washed hair?
3. How often and how should I wash my hair?

4. What is the best locking gel?

5. What are the best blogs for this information?
6. How can I keep my dreads from being too scalpy?
7. Is it locs, locks, dreads or dreadlocks?

What I Learned At My First Writers Conference: The Agents

Continuing from the last post, I ended up pitching to two agents. Neither  accepted nor wanted to see my book, but one agent asked an interesting question:

1. Why am I using dwarves and elves?  They are just stereotypes or codes for different races.  They are outdated.
1. I've heard about certain fairy races being racist as it pertains to Lord of the Rings (1,2), but of fairy creatures in general not so much.    So I'm not supposed to use fairy creatures?  It doesn't matter, my job will be to make my characters more than cookie cutter stereotypes. 
2. But I have to admit, I cringe a little when I say that there are elves and dwarves in my book.  I need to get over this.  If I'm going to write about then, I need to own it. 

He also told me that my pitch was a simplistic. Thankfully, I got some good advice from Google+ gave me so good ideas on how to make it better.  Kristin Lamb recently posted on a good pitch examples also.

Lastly, he told me that I needed to workshop the hell out of my novel so that I should get as many perspectives on my novel as possible.  So… does anyone know of any good critique groups that are online or in Oklahoma City?

I talked to another agent and she said my book sounded commercial, but she didn't deal with fantasy.  She said it was commercial.  That's good,, right?  So why does what the first agent say resonate more than what the other agent said.  Is it because we are more likely to hear and listen to the negative than the positive.

Overall, I left the conference feeling very discouraged.  Not because no one accepted my pitch, but because  there are so many writers there trying to get discovered.  Thousands of people trying to get one bone.   Before I went to the conference, I had faith that if I put in the time and the effort, then eventually I would get picked up by a major publisher.  I don't have that faith anymore.  Mainstream publishers publish for the trends and trends change so much that there is no point in writing for them.    Epublshing seems more realistic to me than it had before the conference.    

OWFI Action list

1. Subscribe to publisher's weekly email list-Done
2. Rewrite my pitch-Ongoing
3. Comes up with a plan on how I will diversify my fairies, elves, and dwarves.
4. Get a critique group
• Check out Verla Kay's blue  boards-DONE

5. Join SCWBi-TENTATIVE-I'm not sure if the $85 fee is worth it.
6. Develop a blogging schedule-ONGOING
7. Join and determine my klout score.-DONE